I hate the beach, and it's not the beach's fault. You see I don't like the sun. I don't like to feel it on my face. I don't like when it makes me sweat. Sweat is gross.
I am afraid of the ocean. I saw Jaws the Revenge in the theaters when I was 6. There is no reason for a 6 year old to be seeing that movie... on the big screen. It scarred me for life. I won't go in the ocean past my ankles.
I don't like sand. It's glorified dirt.
But I'll tell you what I do love. I love bikinis. I love tropical drinks. I LOOOOOVE this beach tote by Oscar de la Renta. While I wouldn't take this to the beach, I would most certainly take it to the swankiest roof-deck pool party in NYC.
I'll leave the beach to others.
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